On the 9th of July 2011 five ladies posed most tastefully naked in my garden to support my passion in awakening men & women to their own body awareness.
Each lady was interviewed directly after having their photos taken, so what you read now is a fresh account of how they found the experience.
“I remember when I was young & I saw my mum getting dressed, I looked at her legs & thought “I want my legs to look like that” … looking back now I think it was just wanting to be grown up as my legs are like my mothers & I now want my shapely toned legs back.
I remember going to exercise classes not to shape up, just to be with friends & do something. I used t wear baggy clothes & I guess looking back I didn’t feel like I was trying to cover up just that I liked baggy jumpers, my skirts were always short & I had great legs, however that was not a conscious thought either.
My uncles & aunties use to go on about how skinny I was & I must of thought it wrong because I can remember drinking something called weight gain to put on some pounds & being disappointed when it did not work. I was always told to cover up as I had 3 brothers. One of them, my oldest half brother sexually abused me so in a way (though I cannot remember) some of this was better, more comfortable for me.
I remember doing the pencil test, to check my boobs were not getting to droopy & previous to that I somehow remember doing exercises where you say “I must, I must improve my bust.”
Where periods were concerned I cannot remember my mum talking to me about them part from saying when I started I must always remember to change regularly & flush the toilet. I could not ask my mum any questions about periods. I didn’t feel open to do this.
I am still a little shy about others seeing my body even my mum as its not what I am used to. Jade (my daughter) also started to get shy around me about her body when she was about 9, however she also spent a lot of time around my mum when she was growing up.
I used to think period blood was somehow unclean & disgusting. I no longer think this & think it changed when I had my operation for fibroids & they wanted to take my uterus way, not sure why it changed. I guess I stared to think about it more rather than it being a something that happened to me.
I have an almost non existent scar which I love. My stomach is not as flat & toned as it has been & will be & that’s ok, I love it too.
When I look in the mirror I love what I see. My breasts are sometime pertish, & sometimes not. I prefer them perkier. My legs & thighs are thicker than I would like & my thighs touch in between. I don’t think its media that makes me want my thighs more toned or boobs perkier … for me it’s remembering how they used to be & how I had no real regard for my body, meaning I paid it no attention. I don’t even think that I looked at my body in the mirror at all, I actually went years being bale to look at myself in clothes but not take in my actual face, shape or the person I was.
I am proud of my body, all its little jiggles & wiggles, seeing my arse drop & having it rise again. I have a good shape loved by me.